THE WORLD HOP

So the World Cup has started, and with it my four-yearly channel-hop to avoid any reference to it whatsoever. This is increasingly difficult, as many of the adverts on the commercial TV channels now contain material which is referential to it. I already have a policy, however, to turn the sound off all commercial breaks, so this does not present a real problem. Why? Because I'm worth it, of course!

I don't care who wins the World Cup, as long as I don't have to witness the obscenity of this spectacle. Whether it's England, Brazil or the Trashemite Republic of Asphyxia who carries off the coveted silverware doesn't matter in the slightest - they'll be doing it unwatched by me. And the same situation would obtain if Scotland had succeeded in achieving the embarrassment of participation in the later stages of the tournament. I feel no particular national affiliation to Scotland (I've always regarded myself as British), and Scottish goal celebrations (on the rare occasions when they occur!) are as obscene as any other nation's. The same goes for for the foul-mouthed, drunken, ill-natured throng who compose the team following. If anyone harbours any hopes with regard to how far mankind has advanced over the millenia, let him/her take a look at an aggrieved football crowd and weep. And why can't they sing in tune, for heaven's sake??

Ugh!